Deep Throating During Oral Sex

Deep throating is an intense form of fellatio in which an individual puts an erect penis as deep in their mouth as possible. Deep throating is commonly considered the most challenging fellatio technique to perform. The pharyngeal reflex or “gag reflex” is often triggered during deep throating. This is because the penis is constantly touching the soft palate, the back of the tongue, the back of the throat, and the tonsils. Therefore, deep throating requires suppression of the gag reflex, which takes muscle control and willingness.1 Oftentimes, deep throating requires learning and practicing. Deep throating may be intimidating or unappealing for some people, however, it can be a very rewarding and exciting experience.

The Gag Reflex

Typically, the more challenging aspect of deep throating is learning to control the gag reflex.  When performing fellatio, the penis does not usually reach the area of the mouth that may trigger a gag reflex; deep throating takes the penis much further than typical fellatio. Many people find that the series of muscle contractions that accompany the gag reflex during deep throating can provide intense stimulation to the penis. Because of this, using the gag reflex as a technique for deep throating can be a positive experience. However, gagging may be uncomfortable or undesired for some people, so learning to suppress the gag reflex can also be an approach to deep throating. 

Practicing with the Gag Reflex

Familiarizing oneself with the gag reflex is a great place to start when trying to suppress it more easily. Practicing with safe, phallic objects such as a finger, silicone dildo, or toothbrush handle are good options to start with. The object should not have any sharp edges or corners, and it should be a smooth texture so that there is no scratching; make sure that the object is able to be gripped firmly as well. Clean or sterilize the object to maximize the overall safety of this practice. The steps below walk through some basic techniques to use with the practice object:

  1. Place the object near the back of the tongue
  2. Gently press the back of the tongue with the object
  3. Pull the object out if you feel nauseous or uncomfortable
  4. Slowly move the object deeper into the mouth 
  5. Adjust your breath through the nose instead of the mouth
  6. Hold the object in place for a few seconds at a time, increasing the amount with practice
  7. Repeat the process above as much as you are comfortable with

The reason for this practice is to become familiar with the feeling of foreign objects touching the pharynx and throat. This practicing process can be as slow and gentle as needed and should never cause any pain or major discomfort. Everyone has different gag reflexes; some individuals may learn quicker than others and that is okay. It is not required to first practice with objects before deep throating a penis, but it is always a good option for exploration.

Overall Tips

When beginning to practice deep throating on a penis, it is recommended that the individual performing the act is in a position that is comfortable and offers them control of the situation. This allows the giver to have better control over the depth, angle, and speed the penis is inserted. Deep throating can last from a few seconds to as long as the individuals want; beginners may prefer a shorter period of deep throating as they are familiarizing themselves with the sensations. 

Lubrication

Person Holding a Eggplant

Lubrication helps improve any type of penetrative sex, which includes deep throating. Deep throating a dry penis can be painful and dangerous. Always begin by sufficiently lubricating the penis. This includes using saliva by licking the penis from the head, down the shaft, and towards the base of the penis; one can also use lubricants that are safe to ingest as replacements for saliva. This will help the penis to slide in and out of the throat more easily.

Once an individual is deep throating, the salivary glands are naturally going to produce saliva. People commonly drool, have a runny nose, or produce tears as a natural biological response. As long as there is no pain, these reactions are completely normal. It is recommended to put a towel down beforehand; there will always be a lot of salivae when deep throating, and that is a good thing. Proper lubrication reduces the chance of too much friction, which could cause pain or hurt during deep throating.

Positions

To make deep throating easier, try out different positions. A popular method involves keeping the throat and mouth in a straight line, reducing the likelihood of hitting the gag reflex. The most comfortable methods place the performer in control by being on top in a position of power. Other examples include the receiver laying down on their back with the giver’s head above the penis, or having the receiver sit on a bed/chair as the giver kneels in front with their hands on the receiver’s knees and head slightly above the penis. More advanced positions include the giver lying on their back with their head hanging slightly over the bed and the receiver inserting the penis while standing over the giver, or the giver kneeling while looking up towards the ceiling while the receiver inserts the penis from above. These positions are more advanced as the receiver has more control over the movement of the penis. With any of these techniques, try to go with the natural curvature of the penis. Remember to relax the jaw and continue breathing in a steady manner. 

Breathing

Once the penis is entirely deep throated, the most important thing is to remain relaxed. Do not forget to breathe steadily; breathing through the nose is typically easier than the mouth. Breathing helps to relax the throat, and the tenser the throat is, the more likely it is to gag or experience discomfort. However, when the penis is thrusting in and out while deep throating, breathing through the nose is very difficult. Instead,  take a breath in between each thrust, or switch in between deep throating and regular fellatio. 

Using Hands 

While performing deep throat, using hands in addition to the mouth can add extra stimulation and sensation. 

Some examples of this include using one hand to cup around the base of the penis; this would offer the giver more control over the depth that the penis will go into the throat. Gently squeezing around the base of the penis also allows more blood flow to remain in the penis, increasing the sensitivity for the receiver. The giver can also use their hands to lightly massage, fondle, rub, or gently squeeze the testicles. Manual stimulation allows the giver to pleasure themselves during deep throat as well. 

Humming

Thrusting can be an enjoyable deep throating technique, but deep throating does not have to be constant thrusting. After becoming comfortable with the penis in the throat, allow the penis to stay still and remain in the throat while the giver stimulates the penis by making noises that emulate vibration. The most common way to do this is through humming; the vibration of the vocal cords provide an extra level of sensation for the receiver.

Ejaculation During Deep Throating

If the individuals involved want to experience ejaculation during deep throat, there many different ways to go about this. The receiver can ejaculate outside of the mouth, inside the mouth, or while the giver is still deep throating the penis. No matter where the receiver ejaculates, it is necessary that this process is consensual among all individuals involved. If the receiver is going to ejaculate in the giver’s throat, the giver must be comfortable with this and prepare themselves accordingly. The preparation includes holding the breath to prevent semen from entering the respiration tract and relaxing the throat to prevent choking. It is up to the giver to decide if they would like to swallow or spit out the semen. 

Safety Tips

It is always important to be aware of the body’s sensations and comfortability. One should never experience pain while deep throating. It is always recommended to start out slow and gauge the level of intensity that the individual’s involved desire. In addition, affirmative consent is crucial when participating in any and all sexual experiences.

The possibility of sexually transmitted infections (STIs) should also be considered during all sexual experiences. In some cases, deep throating can lead to tiny tears inside the oral cavity which raises the risk of STI transmission. The best way to ensure protection is by using a barrier method such as a condom; when using a condom, it should not be too large or too small. The correct condom size will avoid the possibility of it slipping off the penis or breaking. Holding the end of the condom in place can help to prevent it from slipping off. Proper lubrication also helps to prevent condom breakage and slippage.2

There are products sold in the market that are advertised as desensitizing spray for oral sex. These sprays are not recommended; it is always important to feel the natural sensations during any sexual experience in order to gauge if there is pain or a sign that the sexual act should stop. 

Communication is always a crucial aspect of sex. Talk about deep throating with all individuals involved before engaging in the act. Discuss boundaries, past experiences, goals, fantasies, and whatever else will allow as much clear communication as possible. Deep throating is optional and no one is obligated to perform deep throating; not everyone can participate in deep throating and that is completely okay. Affirmative consent is always necessary. It can be beneficial to keep a continual dialogue going throughout the entire sexual experience. Checking in with each other is a great way to make sure everyone is having an enjoyable and positive experience. Deep throating can be extremely rewarding and pleasurable when boundaries and fantasies are discussed.

Concluding Remarks

Deep throating is a deeply intimate variation of oral sex. It requires practice, patience, control, and communication. Safety is a major concern when performing deep throating. It is important for all individuals involved to be highly aware of their actions and intentions. When done right, deep throating can bring an extremely high level of sexual pleasure and novelty sensation. There should never be pressured to perform deep throating. Instead, deep throating should always be a consensual and exciting sexual act for those who choose to experience it. 

References

  1. Leder, S B. “Gag Reflex and Dysphagia.” Head & Neck, U.S. National Library of Medicine. 1996. 
  2. Cooper, Benjamin G., Stacy L. Chin, et.al. “Friction-lowering Capabilities and Human Subject Preferences for a Hydrophilic Surface Coating on Latex Substrates: Implications for Increasing Condom Usage.” Royal Society Open Science. 2018. 

Last Updated: 17 November 2019.